this is my prayer

Dear God,

I'm not sure I believe in you. I believe in something and it might be you. I find too many little coincidences in life not to believe that you or someone like you is out there. I have been given a gift. A gift to examine my life and find myself anew. Please don't let me squander it. These are the things I like to do. Cook, bake, exercise, organize my closets and drawers, paint and wallpaper, sew, paper craft, watch movies, blog and write. I like physical labor, working with my hands, being on my feet and moving, talking to people,connecting with people and pleasing people. I like to be with people and I like to be alone. I like animals especially cats, birds and rodents. I like to take long hikes. I love nature. I love sunsets. I love to think about how I would decorate a room. I love color and how colors work together. I like to plan meals and set pretty tables. I love clothing and shoes and putting together outfits. I love music but I'm not musical. I love theater and the arts but I'm not particularly artistic.

I'm not so hot on numbers, managing people or politics. I'm ashamed that I don't care for these things because I feel that they are the things that smart people care about. The things that could get you a good career.

So please help me fashion a life from the things I love. I am searching for a purpose. Searching for work that consumes and soothes my body and soul. Asking for patience and determination. But I am floundering here. Guide me.

Angel of God
My guardian dear
In whom God's love
Entrusts me here
Ever this day be at my side
to light and guard and rule and guide.