soul searching

I was reading the blog of my niece, Becky, tonight. She is reading a book that asks 48 questions and she answered the first eight of them. These kinds of questions scare me but made me do some soul searching about the answers I would provide. I hope she doesn't mind that I'm a copycat. Here goes.

1. Who gave you your first job? What kind of job was it? How much money did you make?

I believe that my first job was babysitting and I think I made an dollar an hour. I'm sorry to say that I never really liked babysitting all that much although I babysat full time a couple of summers. I was always very relieved when the mothers reclaimed their babies. Around this same time I also detasseled corn one summer. This has to be one of the crappiest jobs in the world. I would meet other detasselers at the park and we would ride in the back of a truck to the corn field where we would ride on detasseling machines through the rows of early morning dew-soaked corn. Our job was to pull the tassels out of the corn creating lady corn plants that could be fertilized by men corn plants with tassels. Like Mr. Rogers said girls are fancy on the inside and boys are fancy on the outside. We became immediately soaked by the dew and remained in wet clothes throughout most of the day. The corn leaves are very sharp on the edges and delivered small cuts like paper cuts on our arms and legs. I only detasseled corn one summer. I must have been quite young when I performed these jobs because when I was 14 years of age I got a work permit so I could start working at our local grocery store as a checkout clerk and shelf stocker. My salary increased to $1.25 an hour and remained at that level throughout my whole grocery store career. I worked there throughout high school after school and on Saturdays. And then while I was in college I worked there during the summers. I was also an entrepreneur in high school. I had my own little cake baking business. I baked and sold cakes for birthdays and other functions in my small home town. My specialty was cut-out cakes. Cakes in the shapes of animals, vehicles etc.

2. From looking at your work life so far, what has been of the greatest value or worth?
Boy, I wish I knew the answer to that question. What do they mean by value or worth? The jobs that have provided me with the most income have not been the jobs that have made me feel the most valuable. Continuing on with the jobs that that I have held....
When I was in college I worked summers in the grocery store. I only held one job for a short while when I was away at college. I waited tables for a short time at Pizza Hut. I liked this job. The evening was busy and passed by quickly. People have to eat and for the most part were friendly and gracious. After I graduated from college and moved to the big city I got a job at J C Penneys at Woodfield Mall in Chicago. I actually loved this job. I loved helping people with their selections and ringing up their purchases. I got to interact with so many people everyday. But I knew I had just graduated with a degree in accounting and I had to make something of my life. Before a year was out I put my nose to the grindstone and found a job that was worthy of the degree I had earned. Listen to this.....when I met with the HR director at JC Penneys to resign my position, I told her I was resigning because I had a degree in accounting and I was pursuing something in my field...she said to me...you will never amount to anything. I guess she was upset that I was leaving because I was a good worker. I was young and vulnerable and insecure. Her words cut me deeply. Now that I think about this I am very angry at her. At the time I was hurt and I think I believed her. Was she right?
I deviate from the question. Helping people...that is the the thing I value most. Yesterday I helped two women who had both lost their husbands in April one week apart. Last month I helped a women who was recently divorced and couldn't even balance her checkbook. They were all devastated, lost, clueless. They were all grateful for my help. Such little things I did for them and they were so grateful.

3. If your job changes, does your purpose change?
What? I don't understand the question. What is my purpose? I just want to be happy doing something that makes me happy.


4. Do you think your current job will exist five years from now?

I absolutely do know it will will exist. I just don't want to be doing it five years from now.

5. What would be the key characteristics of an ideal job or career?

I would be interacting with people. Talking, moving around, doing something with my hands, creating something that I could look upon proudly and say I did this. People would say "You did this this?" and I would demurely respond that I had.

6. When you daydream, what do you see yourself doing?

I see myself owning an restaurant creating lovely meals for people to enjoy. Or having a studio creating art in some way. Or owning a shop of some kind. Or teaching exercise classes. Or all of those things combined in some way.

7. What have been the happiest, most fulfilling moments in your life?

Most definitely the years I spent as a full time mother and homemaker. Raising my child, having the time to do the things I love....reading, running, working out, sewing, crafting, planning and cooking meals, decorating my house.

8. If nothing changed in your life in the next 5 years, would that be OK?

It would be the death of me.